Sunday Morning Thoughts 2.19.12: Special Edition – The Beginning of the End of the Beginning

Why would this one be special at all you ask? Well to start, it’s properly advertised. It actually is Sunday Morning. Not Monday afternoon. Not Wednesday night. Not Friday just after lunch. I think that makes this one special, or at the very least I’m hoping that it will make it special. There was a reason that I picked a Sunday morning to start all of this. It had a lot to do with me having a mental breakdown on a Saturday but there are other and now more true reasons to have something like this on a Sunday morning.

To start, there is serenity to the way the sun rises on a Sunday. There is a peace that other day just don’t know. Week days are tiresome and full of work for most. Saturday and the parts of Friday that are deemed the weekend end up being just as tiring but in a completely different but necessary direction.

Sunday is also a day that is pleasantly lost. It is supposed to be the beginning of the week but is referred to as the end so often and it doesn’t do a thing to correct anyone. Especially for a man without a god and no temple to regulate myself, the feeling of Sunday leaves this feeling of perpetual motion that would seem to be relentless in the universe.

But none of that makes this really and truly unique. I don’t want to be a liar so I’ll keep chipping away at some sort of reason.  I could say this is a special edition because there are so many other things that I need to be writing like newspaper columns and film papers and yet here I am writing this. Now is that a testament to the magnitude of the work being done or does it just show how truly lazy I have become? I imagine that is as most things are which is just a mix of all the options.

Wait here’s an idea. I sit at my rather cluttered desk and feel the impending weight of so many things that I am required to do in my life and I need something grand. You see, I was talking to the last king of my realm for the first time in a long time yesterday. We decided that the world is our playground, essentially. Now with such a proclamation one would assume that there would be evidence of such a thing. Well doubting Tommy, you can hang around until some more visible sign start to appear but remember they are angelic and celestial, those who don’t necessarily see it, but still think it’s real. I think that’s called faith but I couldn’t be sure.

There exists within all of us, this idea that we have of ourselves and our world and it is our own. Now there is a larger world that exists between all people which is where the tricky part comes in, but only if you’re looking at it with the wrong light. You see, in order to master one you must also master the other. I don’t know the particular order in which this can or should be done but I’m going to guess that it starts at the self and becoming king or queen respectively of that domain. Then from there you just go with it and take all that is yours.

He and I were talking about life, as we usually do. He proposed the idea that life is this beautiful vision that you let guide you in peaceful flow. I will have to disagree, sort of. At least not entirely disagree. I think that life is beautiful and peaceful but there is peace in motion. There is also no peace without chaos. You would not want to live your whole life in peace to have it end in chaos. You have to live within the chaos to find that peace. Meditation in a burning building. Listening to Ludwig Van as your car slams into another. Thinking about a childhood crush as you charge off into war. If you have peace at the end it will be sweeter than any and everything you’ve ever known. If you have peace the whole time, I imagine that the ending will be unwanted and fought.

A life of chaos doesn’t mean bliss in your final moments directly, you have to do certain things first. You have to come to terms with any demons or anything of that sort. You have to understand yourself without being too bold or too modest. You may have to been in a true and heart wrenching love at least once, but I can’t really say.

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