Sunday Morning Thoughts 5.1.11

Sweet mercy me, all this life and not a thing to do about it. So dig this and that and all things that go with it, for this my friends is my vague explanation for what is going on as of right now in the world of this one person amongst billions. I feel inspired, yet tired and all that I see tears at my heart with beauty ripping away at the fibers of all that make up me. It’s the most peaceful little slice of chaos that any young man dreams of controlling. Though we’ll all fail, we still crave the attempt, just maybe to earn a life beyond this body and to live forever through all that I have created.

I spent time with life and feel alright about it. I walked through the city with all the wonder of the world upon me, thinking of what has passed and what has yet to come and if I have any kind of say of what goes on. Do I? Can I sculpt my life and my future and pull all the things that I search for within my grasp as I watch it all dance around me? These are thoughts of mine and that’s all I have because that’s all I am. I am nothing but an idea that craves to creep into the minds of others. I am nothing but the thought of what I am and what you may see me as.

So what is your idea of me? When you see me or hear me, what is there? Is there anything? I want there to be. I want the thought of me bring somebody something nice. Maybe there’ll be a person who when they think about me just feels all that a soul can feel. Maybe not. Maybe there is but it will never be any type of fulfilled fruition.

Then I stop and think and realize that maybe this is just my hopes and dreams driving me over the brink of madness. I sit in my little world of memories and ideas and get tossed around by that spinning rock I’m on. I may be delusional but I can’t tell. It’s hard to tell if anything is ever anything at all, so am I really mad for thinking how I do? I want to think it’s real, but if it isn’t? Then what? Well?

You don’t know and neither do I and that’s all we’ve got. But we’ve also got nothing but time and life and the sort, so do as you please and so shall I. But I can’t shake the memories or at least not yet, so all I do will be undoubtedly influence by the only things that I believe I know to be true. So be true and lie if you must, it’s all the same in the end. Right?

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